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Buckle up – it’s been a while, but it’s……QUAD DOUBLE STORY TIME!!! I checked my history, by the way. My last Quad Double was August 16, 2025. 331 days ago. I was down 50 pounds then. Right now, I’m down 85-90, depending on the day. I still have about 50 I’d like to lose.

All joking aside, the last year has been hard mental work. I’ve analyzed my eating habits, sources of emotional eating, weeding out triggers for anxiety, unpacking trauma and hurts that lead to depressive moments, and overall, I’ve worked to be a much more emotionally healthy person.

Part of that journey has been to identify a wrongly placed need to “reward” my choices or my activities with food. After umping a baseball game, the temptation to eat, grab candy, slushies…something…can hit hard.

As I drove to Shippensburg tonight to umpire a game, I deliberated for a while. I realized after my game I may face a similar temptation, and I decided to eat prior to the game – mostly out of need, not desire, and to avoid “rewarding” my umping with a non-necessary treat. I realized that I hadn’t eaten much today, and my overthinking was not healthy. I desired a Quad Double. I’ve seen weight success, and it was time! As luck would have it, I chose to break my fast food delicacy hunger strike at my home field: the Dillsburg Wendy’s dumpster fire!

As I drove to the Dillsburg Debacle, I debated: what constitutes a Quad Double? Is it truly only able to be made from a Dave’s Double (2×1/4 pound patties) but using the thinner patties (4×1/8 pound patties)? After all: some establishments have denied me. Perhaps creative thinking could expand my culinary horizons and convince other Wendy’s to custom make my favorite sandwich! Imagine, if you will, a Double Stack (2×1/8 pound patties) essentially doubled: would that also make a Quad Double? My appetite arithmetic abounded, and I was doing calculus, trying to determine the many ways a Quad Double could be achieved, both in terms of overall price, balanced against the willingness of the staff to replicate my dear Tyler’s original creation! Before these ideas had reached their zenith, I had arrived at the location of the origin story of our Quad Double saga!

First things first: the screen STILL doesn’t work. It’s been more than 2 years. At this point, the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, the Cathedral at Notre Dame, heck, maybe even Trump’s White House Ballroom MIGHT be finished prior to this screen being fixed or replaced.

Secondly: I don’t know if Tyler still works here. For this chapter, the part of Tyler is now played by Colin. Spoiler alert: you’re gonna like Colin!

Thirdly: the Sheetz where Tyler was slacking off in the original story? It’s been replaced (quite apropos, I believe, since Tyler is ALSO replaced) with a newer, sleeker, modernized Sheetz.

I spoke into the broken display screen: “Can I please get a Dave’s Double, large fry, and a frosty for my beverage?”

“Sure thing”, came the reply. Boom. Golden. Now the hard part…

“I have a request”, I began.

“Okay”…the broken speaker tentatively responded.

I went through my usual spiel. Swap the two big patties for four smaller ones: it’s no more beef than what you’re giving me, and no less either. Shouldn’t be a problem, you’ve done it before…all the lines I’ve rehearsed.

“Uhh….I’ll have to check” my pensive cohort replied. The damaged screen went silent for at least 5 seconds, and my heart fluttered. The merciless anticipation! The cruelty being inflicted on me! I held to every click and pop from the malfunctioning speaker! After what felt like eternity, miraculously, the speaker responded in the affirmative. Yep, they could do it!! EUREKA!!! I’ve been burned before, so my celebration typically does not reach full note until such time as I am holding the Four Maillard Reaction patties in one bun.

I pulled forward, and handed the drive-thru worker my credit card. It was at this time that I learned Colin’s name, thanks to a small name tag on his stained shirt.

He asked: “What flavor Frosty do you want??”

This question: it’s unnecessary. Frosty’s are unequivocally chocolate. They always have been. If someone says they want a Coke, you don’t ask which flavor! If someone wants Diet Coke, they add a modifier. Same with Cherry Coke, Coke with Vanilla, Coke Zero, or Diet Coke with Lime. But Coke is Coke. Same with a Frosty! If you want a Vanilla Frosty, you add the modifier! Anyone had the Strawberry one? It was terrible, but I digress…

I answered him: “Chocolate please”. I really wanted to scream “JUST GIVE ME MY QUAD DOUBLE YOU MONSTER!!!!”, but I restrained myself. My therapist would tell me to be kind to myself and celebrate the win in my emotional growth over my temper. But I just wanted my sandwich…so I smiled at Colin. Good Colin!

A few moments passed, and the bag was handed through the window. Folks: the bag was heavy. That’s a good sign. Four patties, with fixins, fries, and the requisite spoon for the Frosty means some heft must be attained! (See my previous story for the debacle with a Frosty spoon!)

I snaked my hand past the fry container, until my fingers found the Crown Jewel of Foil Wrapped Delight! The sandwich, warm and wrapped, had not only heft, but near symmetrical dimensions! My heart raced, and I began a Pavlovian response to my impending treat! I opened the packaging, and I was greeted by a quatrain of bovine delight!! It appeared as though the sun shone more brightly upon my meal! I took a bite, savoring its goodness, and remarking at how much I missed Tyler’s culinary creation. It was every bit as good as I remembered it being!

Colin, for his part, answered another question for me. As I looked at my Wendy’s bag, I noticed the receipt, upon which lay the following answer to my Ingrediential Inquisition of “What Constitutes a Quad Double?” Colin coded my sandwich not with the expected “Dave’s Double” moniker, but rather with a “Double Stack: custom order additional 2 patties”, for $0.99/patty for the custom request. Colin, you amazing man, you gastronomical genius! You saved me money AND I believe may have paved a way for greater success in requesting future Quad Doubles! Tyler walked so that Colin could RUN! All future success on Quad Doubles may very well hinge on this Burger-y Breakthrough!

As to my sandwich’s legitimacy: I have consulted with the Council of Quad Doubles. They have issued a ruling, and I both accept, concur, and evangelize it as such: Quad Doubles made from Double Stacks are indeed of the same type, nay, the ESSENCE of the Quad Double. Book it as “Quad Double Canon”, henceforth, that a Quad Double may be constructed from either source!

On a more serious note: as I savored my meal, I was burdened for a moment by brief guilt about consuming a much larger meal than I am accustomed to eating. For what it’s worth, half of my fries (not the container, just the food) went out the window, as I was more than satiated with the burger, and the fries weren’t hitting the spot. This is a huge win for me, as it has been several times before when I have overindulged or allowed my appetite to order more than I need or want.

And in the end, I really think that’s the larger payoff here: it was a win for my food choice, stopping when I was full, and not giving power to the reward mentality I’ve been trapped in previously.

eads up! This is a two parter! Health journey update AND a Wendy’s Quad Double story!

Earlier this week, I finally passed a milestone for which I’ve been eagerly waiting. On Wednesday, the scale finally flashed the number that indicated >50 pounds of weight loss since I started my Zepbound journey.

50 pounds: it’s the weight of a large sandbag, or 10 bags of flour, but also a little under 1/7 of my starting weight. It represents a first step, and 1/3 of my 150 pound weight loss goal.

I’m incredibly grateful, humbled, but I also feel the magnitude of how far I have yet to go. I’m aware of how powerful my addiction to food was/is, and I’m also thankful for the lessons I’m learning about self-denial, how much I actually need to consume, and the emotional and psychological aspects to my relationship with food.

It may seem antithetical to my weight loss goal, but Eric Blas kept asking to go for a quad double with me (my name for a Wendy’s Dave’s Double made from 4 smaller 1/8 pound patties, instead of 2 larger 1/4 pound patties. We decided to catch up and also celebrate!

Today, Eric and I had our quad doubles…kinda. If you read my previous updates, you’ll know…Dillsburg Wendy’s is a dumpster fire of a fast food joint. But like a train wreck, I can’t look away, and so we met at high noon on Old Mill Road…

Eric pays (thanks Eric!) and I instruct the employee “Napoleon” (I forget Napoleon’s actual name) that we want the burger custom ordered. Napoleon assures me he can do it, and then asks for a moment to confer with “Dwight” (my nickname for the manager). Napoleon doesn’t know how to enter it in the system.

Dwight tells me “oh, it’s actually a Double Stack with 2 extra patties, and it’s cheaper!” Eric is doubtful. After all, the bun is a little different we think…

We order our custom creation, and I scan for a Jr Frosty, a keytag promo I bought long before I started my weight loss journey. “What flavor frosty do you want?” Napoleon asks. “Buddy, i’m a purist. In my world, there is only 1 flavor…chocolate…the original.” Napoleon nods his head, “I can respect that. Can I have a name for this order?” I wink at Eric, and i say “you sure can – it’s Bill”. My order’s name is now “Bill”.

Andy calls for “Bill” and i walk to the counter: the burgers look REALLY skinny. See, a quad double is squat, husky, hefty, like me. I mean, I lost 50 pounds, but I’m still a XXL…and this supposed quad double is SKINNY. To quote a 1980’s Wendy’s commercial, “where’s the beef?”

Eric and I open our burgers, and our fear is confirmed: We have double stacks, and not custom. I carry the burgers to the counter. Andy acts like I’m holding nuclear waste. I inform they’re missing the patties. “Oh, lemme get you the right patties.”

I shake my head. “You can assemble them please”.

Andy acts like these burgers are gonna explode. “I can’t take them…here are the extra patties.” He tries to hand me a plastic container with 4 cooked patties and no cheese.

Now listen, I love cooking. I enjoy eating fajitas. I like making my own concoction at a restaurant where they serve the meat and peppers on a sizzling iron skillet. I am not opposed to creating my own food…but not at Wendy’s. I shake my head at Andy. “No dice…remake them please”. Andy knows he’s gonna do the right thing.

Eric and I enjoyed our strange Quad Doubles. I ate only half of mine, and half my fries. It’s a function of my weight loss and Zepbound – I just don’t eat much. But I am keenly aware at the end of our meal…Napoleon didn’t get me my Jr Frosty.

I walk up to the counter and remind Napoleon: “hey, that Jr frosty wasn’t on my tray”.

Napoleon asks: “Oops..what flavor?”

At this point, I’m worried i’m in the matrix, and deja vu means Agent Smith is gonna start shooting the walls.

I remind him:

“Buddy…I’m a purist…I mean, chocolate…chocolate please”

He hands me a small cup, no lid. When I ask for a lid, it’s a scavenger hunt. Napoleon can’t find a Jr Frosty lid. “Just give me a moment…”

I walk away, figuring I’ll finish it before he finds the lid.

Dillsburg Wendy’s, your ordering screen STILL doesn’t work in the drive through, and I pray you never find competent management or employees. And I enjoy every visit! Never change please!

Side note: I miss Tyler, the creator of the ORIGINAL quad double…

Well, streaks are made to come to an end. Mine ended at 4: 4 Quad doubles without being denied. Dillsburg, Mechanicsburg, New Oxford, York all complied, but Carlisle, tsk tsk…it ended in ugly fashion.

Dave Thomas is rolling in his grave! If BK means “have it your way”, and McDonald’s means “I’m loving it”, Wendy’s new slogan must be “we’ll keep you guessing!!”

After umping a game in Carlisle, I actually CHOSE to stop at Wendy’s in Carlisle and NOT Chick Fil A! I wanted a quad double, and frankly, a Frosty. I should have known…the strange line at the drive in told a story I wanted to ignore. The queue was moving one car at a time – one car served at the window, then the mobile ordering device barked. This spoke of a team that is mismanaged or understaffed.

It was eventually my turn. I began my normal spiel: “Hey, mobile order for Brandon. I have a custom request: swap each 1/4 pound patty for 2 1/8 pound patties.”

Jake??? (whatever his name is – I don’t remember, but I bet it’s Jake) interrupted me: “So, I didn’t hear you, can you repeat?”

I spoke my instructions again, except I was interrupted. “So ummm…we don’t customize orders. System doesn’t allow it…”

See Jake, here’s the deal. The system probably won’t. But you’re smarter than the system. It’s not AI, and it doesn’t even have to know… let me give you an example, Jake. If I order a meal deal from McDonalds on their app, it’s a $6 deal, but it comes with a medium Diet Coke. But McDonald’s doesn’t charge extra for large sodas or small sodas. They’re all $1. So if I ask nicely, the ordering lady will give me a large in place of the medium. System doesn’t have to know. It’s our secret, and it costs the company NO EXTRA MONEY. Just use your head Jake.

Jake’s not having it, and there’s a line behind me. I admit defeat and drive forward to the window. Jake is avoiding eye contact, because he knows he’s been a bad Jake. Manager is hovering but won’t talk to me either. He knows – Jake messed up.

The sandwich was okay, nothing great, but really, probably not much different than a quad double. I know why I love quad doubles so much – and it has less to do with Maillard reaction and crispy beef, and more to do with a character flaw to which I readily admit: I like to feel special. I like breaking rules, and I like making exceptions.

Jake could take a lesson from Tyler – you had your chance at greatness sir, but sadly you came up short. Carlisle Wendy’s….do better. Now, on to a new streak of quad doubles…

Alfred Tennyson is oft quoted “Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.” But I’m certain Good Old Al never had a Quad Double from Tyler at Wendy’s in Dillsburg and then struggled as I have to recreate my culinary epiphany.

I had a love; We’ve seen each other thrice. Tyler’s “Quad Double” (only twice have I imbibed from him) was replicated by Cumberland Parkway Wendy’s once. Each was bliss (Tyler: Your cooking still holds my heart), but they have ruined me. I am forever consigned to search for the elusive flavor profile which captivated my taste buds.

To review: a Quad Double (so named by Tyler) is a Dave’s Double (2 1/4 lb patties), but made with 4 junior beef patties (1/8 lb). Same meat: but more Maillard reaction on the grill and beef surface means better flavor than a greasy double. Tyler balanced salt and char to produce a tasty, tasty creation! Like Franklin, Edison and Fleming before him, Tyler stumbled into discoveries that were neither planned nor appreciated in their time.

Delco Plaza Wendy’s in York produced a similar burger for my son Micah a few weeks after my initial, and I was eager that the trend was continuing. Hershey Wendy’s claimed they would do a Quad Double, but they simply gave me a Dave’s double with 2 smaller patties – essentially robbing me of meat.

Thursday evening, I again found myself at the Dillsburg Wendy’s. Weary from piano playing, I craved the familiar yet elusive comfort of a Quad Double. I ordered via mobile, and trekked around the building to negotiate my menu hack. Surely the original home of the Quad Double would not disappoint!

Dillsburg Wendy’s, you crafty girl, you never fail to disappoint!

1. The order screen is STILL inoperable

2. The drive through line at 10 PM was 7 cars deep! Not because everyone arrived at once, but because your average order time approaches the frequency of Hailey’s comet

I eventually mentioned my mobile order and asked if someone could make me a Dave’s Double with 4 smaller patties like Tyler had a few weeks prior. The half-asleep worker on the intercom was confused. I explained a second time. “Give me a minute”…I waited about 30 seconds. “Yeah…he’ll make you one.”

HE? HE?? Was Tyler working? Was I about to experience the joy of flavor of this taboo menu hack once again? My taste buds fluttered, and I found myself giddy. I was about to partake once more of the oft-sought after creation of my now-venerated Tyler!!

I parked at the delivery window and awaited my Frosty and Quad Double. Would Tyler hand deliver this treat? I stammered for words to say should he grace my presence. The attendant handed me the Frosty, sans spoon and I contemplated asking for one. But surely one would be in the bag, right? A spoon, and a QUAD DOUBLE. Who could ask for anything more? I quickly posted on Facebook the impending story I’m now imparting.

A minute later, the bag was handed over. Like a kid at Christmas, I drove away and ripped open the bag, eager to see the quatrain of bovine delight from the hands of his highness, Lord Tyler. I peeled off the wrapper, expecting my unrequited desire to be satiated by the presence of four patties and cheese. My eyes beheld….a plain Ole Dave’s Double, replete with 2 of the larger patties. My heart sank, and I cried out in despair, “TYLERRRRRRRR!!!”

Was this a cruel joke? What had I done to be rebuked in this way? What cosmic system of consequences and karma had conspired to deny me of my divine right?

At this moment, my hands frantically searched the bag for the presence of the spoon I had so hastily forgotten. There was none to be found! Once more, my mind sunk into the depths of despair.

I contemplated circling around to fix the error of both portions of my order, but alas, the length of the line demanded that I proceed home, with a plain ole Dave’s double, and a spoon-less Frosty. The burger was bland, a mocking double punch of flavorless meat; a scant reminder of the treat for which I had yearned. I refuse to believe that Tyler made this burger. I refuse to believe he was in the building. I posited to myself that Tyler may only be able to make this treat when he is under the influence of marijuana. My conflict grew, as I would want a sober Tyler, but I desire a treat that can only be made if he’s off the wagon! I have prayed that Tyler remains employed and may someday make me another of his savory creations.

As I drove home, I contemplated the question I now ask you: How should I proceed? It is clear that I cannot continue to order in the manner I have. In addition to my options, I invite others in the comments:

1. Continue to order the Dave’s Double but stress how important the details of this order are

2. Order 2 Double Stacks (They have the Jr Patties I prefer) but ask them to combine them into 1 sandwich at the order window? I would have to add the lettuce and condiments as an upcharge. This would allow me to continue the moniker of the “Quad Double”, but divorce Dave Thomas from Tyler’s and my creation

3. Hearty discussion could be had on the benefits of order in-person vs mobile. I believe mobile being prepaid invites skepticism from the order taker that I’m trying to scam them out of the profit. A “deal” isn’t my goal. Red meat perfection is my goal.

I wanted to provide a brief update on my Wendy’s situation:

I visited the same Wendy’s a few days ago. I ordered a Dave’s Double via mobile, and via the now functioning com system, I asked them to make my double with 4 2 oz patties , and they obliged! I also got 4 regular nuggets for my wife (coincidentally named Wendy Danner).

My man Tyler opened the drive thru window. He started nervously: “ummm my manager is here if you wanna talk to her. We don’t have regular nuggets, but we have spicy ones….” His voice trailed off. I half-expected Tyler to inform me that they were out of 4-pc nuggets but he would gladly substitute a 6 -pc instead. I nodded that a 4-pc spicy would be acceptable.

He appeared a few minutes later, spicy nugs and my custom burger in hand. “Here’s your nuggets and your quadruple double.”

Tyler, you did it again. It was great AND you named it!!!

*flash forward to today*

Micah, my son, loves a good burger. The guy is a connoisseur and ranks his favorite burgers too. I was bringing home lunch for him, and he requested to try the quad double.

I was at the Carlisle Road Wendy’s in York, and again on com, I asked for the magical treat. After a brief delay, I held in my hands the THIRD of its kind.

Wendy’s, it’s time to put it on the menu. Notify your franchisees! I won’t stop requesting it!